All Roads Have Rocks

By the time our children start school, we’ve already chosen one side over another a dozen times. For every decision my family makes, I can find a camp ready to fight to the death saying it is not only a good choice but the only choice I can make if I love my child. I completely get it — the surge you feel when you hear absurd arguments being made to justify an easy road or the switch that flips inside when you are pressed to feel so small over a choice you wrestled with and prayed over. On any given day we all desperately want to be reassured that we’re doing a good job and making the right choices for our family. It is in the heat of these encounters that each of us has made claims that logically just cannot be, but we get so upset that the need to defend a position is too difficult to resist. We start using words like always and never to villainize everyone who disagrees.

I love homeschooling and if asked would probably suggest you choose it for your family. I believe it facilitates outstanding things in a child’s education and growth as a person. There are some impressive success stories of homeschooled kids that have grown up to change the world. However, if I or anyone else ever suggests that homeschooling is easy, fixes everything, and eliminates all problems associated with the education and raising of children, know that it is simply not true. Likewise, public school by its very nature facilitates some great things for children – instant structure, peer motivation, and great networking opportunities for college and careers. Public school graduates students, including myself, every year, who enter adulthood with the skills they need to succeed and bring good to the world. Similarly, if anyone tries to convince you that public school can stamp out every struggle and fill every child’s needs perfectly, all the time, it is a lie. Either vehicle we choose will hit rocks and holes in the road.

Take any other opposing views, and the scenario will be the same. One side solves specific problems while creating others. Being married has significant elements like companionship and security, but the struggles of living in harmony with another person are genuine. Being single eliminates that struggle while creating the burden of isolation. Moving out to the country gives you fresher air and better views, but you usually have to drive quite a bit to run errands. There are trade-offs and sacrifices. The next time a heated debate lands in your lap try to remember this: most of our choices are less about finding a clear path to our goal, and more about the most comfortable and least compromising way to navigate the road with the rocks. At times there are real issues that need to be faced, don’t deceive yourself into thinking that either side is a slam dunk. Successful results come from hard work, commitment, and sacrifice; not simply picking the right side of an issue.

Amy Butler is a disciple of Christ, the wife of an engineer, mother of three, part time piano teacher and a lover of nature. Writing is where all of her passions come together as she struggles to find the WRITE Balance.