A Lesson in Patience and Maturity

“I just love it when my friends decide it’s time for me to start a diet!” said no person ever.  I may know without a doubt that I need to start that diet, but if it isn’t something I’ve come to terms with or decided on my own, it will either flat out not happen or not be effective long-term.  It might just be my strong-willed nature, but I don’t like being told I need to do something before I’ve had a chance to come to that conclusion myself.  Like my daughter in true mini-me fashion says, “Let me do it, mom!”  We are all so hypocritical sometimes when we want to do what we want, what we want in our own lives, but get so vehemently opinionated when others want that same liberty.

The single-most valuable thing about homeschooling is the ability to educate your children the way you choose is best.  That choice alone will result in going against the grain in some form or another.  We can’t do whatever we want while being just like everyone else at the same time.  Yet, we are all guilty of trying to imitate a public school classroom in some way before we remember that the whole reason we made this choice was so we wouldn’t have to follow the crowd if it didn’t suit our needs.  There is a similar phenomenon when we start to pressure others into homeschooling or into our method of homeschooling.  I know, I know,we all just want others to succeed and so we try to share our success with others.  And I don’t think there is anything wrong with that.  What sometimes gets forgotten is that, like every child’s reading readiness or onset of puberty, we don’t all arrive at the same time.

In so many ways, it all comes down to maturity.  It takes maturity to recognize when the direction you are heading isn’t working and to turn the car around.  It also takes maturity to recognize others for where they are and let them be there, no matter how much you know your answer would solve it all.  There will always be those who are new to the trend or new to the stage of life who haven’t learned what you have.  With time, they likely will learn or grow tired of what doesn’t work well.  Then they will be ready for whatever diet or curriculum that’s working for you.  The key is to make sure we remain a balanced influence.  If you hide away your choices in life, they might never know what works for you.  However, if you are preaching, so to speak, on every street corner, they might start to resent or ignore you.

It is hard enough to hold my tongue and let my kids learn things for themselves so it’s no wonder I struggle with not just blurting out when I think others should live life like me.   What I’m trying to focus on is just how futile it often is for someone to force their ideas on me.  When I’m seeking help and input, I LOVE to pick people’s brains.  Like the golden rule and maturity preaches, let’s worker harder at treating others the way we want to be treated – with patience and maturity.

Amy Butler is a disciple of Christ, the wife of an engineer, mother of three, part time piano teacher and a lover of nature.  Writing is where all of her passions come together as she struggles to find the WRITE Balance.