How to Recover When You’ve Crashed and Burned
Most of us have experienced “those” seasons.
The ones that leave us exhausted, shriveled up, and sometimes hopeless.
Loss of a job, a big move, the death of a loved one, an extended illness, hospitalization, marital woes, or… a worldwide pandemic that leaves us closed up for months on end with only social media, conspiracy theories, and the ever cheery nightly news to point us in the right direction.
My advice today for you is just a little bit of everything.
I want to share with you some things that have been helpful and have helped me recover during life-changing events in my homeschool and in my personal life. My little article is not going to be the fix in your particular situation. I’ve learned that everyone has unique coping skills, unique situations, and a unique set of resources.
You ever heard “this too shall pass”?
Believe it or not… most things do. You might have the lingering baggage of trauma or long-term effects of your crisis, but most things end.
Here we go. I’m listing some things to consider. I love lists.
- You are not a failure. Even our mistakes can be opportunities.
- Take care of yourself. Nobody can replace you.
- There is nothing wrong with a season or a semester of rest.
- Read to your people. Read often. Read good books. We have had days and weeks when that is all we did.
- Reach out to those who have had similar experiences to you and survived. They will be able to speak truth and joy into you.
- Baby steps, my friends.
- Encourage your kids to explore, learn, and take on independent projects. We want them to do more than regurgitate facts for a test. They need to have a passion for something. Let them find it.
- Focus on relationships rather than results.
- Say yes to offered help. You don’t have to do this by yourself.
- Your child will not have long term psychological damage if he or she doesn’t memorize the entire Gettysburg Address, times tables, or the entire poetry collection of Robert Frost. You do what you can and what is in your child’s range of possibilities.
- You don’t have to belong to a co-op. You don’t have to put your kids in sports. You don’t have to put your kids in ballet. You do you and what works for your kids and family.
- Don’t neglect those routines and rituals like your morning cup of coffee and devotion. Sometimes it’s those rituals that make us feel more human.
- One thing at a time. Set one goal for yourself today. It might be to do a load of laundry. Or maybe make a healthy meal. Or it could be to sit down with your kids to read a funny, laugh-out-loud book like one from the Hank the Cowdog Just do one thing.
- Find joy in the ordinary. For me, it is sitting on the swing on my front porch and watching the birds. Or purchasing a bouquet of grocery store flowers to keep on my dining room table. Or lighting that fancy candle someone got me for Christmas. Or getting out a china tea cup and having a tea party for one.
- I don’t know about you, but I have had my best epiphanies while in recovery. I want to change my focus. I want to keep my eyes on the prize. I want to spend time on what matters. Keep a notebook of goals and the commitments you are making to yourself. Time will pass, and those resolutions will fade into the hustle and bustle of what is “normal.”
- Make your own list. One day, there is going to be somebody who needs to hear what you’ve learned.
Today, my prayer for you is one of peace. One of my favorite Scriptures is one I have reached for over and over again. It is found in Psalms 147:3. It gives us such a sweet promise.
He heals the brokenhearted
And binds up their wounds.
Rebekah Teague is the homeschooling mama to one busy and beautiful boy. She is married to The Muffin who is a pastor and a really great guy. In her spare time she can be found with a book and a cup of tea. She blogs at There Will Be A $5 Charge For Whining.